You sat in his chair. He said nothing. He stood nearby for a few minutes. He mentioned his back. He was back in the chair. This is Chair Power. The same logic runs through his parking spot, his side of the workbench, and his seat at the head of the table.
His spaces are fixed points. Desire for Stability drives it.
Practical Techniques
Leave His Spots Alone
If you know he prefers a specific chair or desk, leave it. It costs you nothing. Fighting over it costs a lot. The preference is not going to change.
Ask Before You Use His Space
If you need access to something in his territory, ask first. “Can I use your workbench for an hour?” is easy. Using it without asking is the problem, not the workbench.
When Change Is Unavoidable, Let Him Pick
If you are reorganizing a room and his chair cannot stay where it is, give him the choice of where it goes. He accepts the change better when he controls at least one part of it. Say: “We need to move things around in here. Where do you want your chair?”
In Shared Workspaces, Agree Explicitly
A direct conversation beats guessing. “I need access to this area for the project. How can we split it?” sets a clear arrangement. Assumptions produce resentment. An agreement does not.
Why This Works
His territory is one of the few things that stays constant. A lot of his control over daily life has already shrunk. The chair has not. Letting him keep it costs very little.
When Territory Blocks Others
There is a difference between a preference and a claim that stops other people from doing their work. If his fixed space is affecting someone else’s ability to function, that is a boundary conversation, not an accommodation.