He needs a new doctor but has seen the same one for fifteen years. He knows the change is necessary. He still does not call to make the appointment. That is Fear of Change in a small, everyday form. Pushing him to “just do it” makes him dig in harder. Taking his concern seriously changes the dynamic.
Practical Techniques
Name the Specific Worry
Do not say “It will be fine.” That dismisses the concern. Name what he is actually worried about. Say: “I know switching doctors is hard when your history is complex. That is a real concern.” He needs to hear that you understand the problem as he sees it.
Problem-Solve the Specific Concern
Once the concern is named, work on it. Say: “Let’s write down the questions you want the new doctor to answer. We can send them before the first appointment.” A concrete step is more useful than general reassurance. “It will work out” gives him nothing to hold. A list of questions does.
Remind Him of a Past Success
He has handled change before. Remind him of a specific time. Say: “You got through the job change in 2019. That was harder than this.” One real example outweighs ten general statements about his ability to cope.
Why This Works
He resists because the worry feels unheard. When someone rushes past the concern to the solution, he hears: nobody takes this seriously. Take the concern seriously first. Then work on it together. That gives him a witness and a partner. Both reduce the resistance.
Not All Resistance Is Wrong
Some changes carry real downsides. The goal is adaptation where it makes sense. If his concern is valid, say so. Say: “Your concern is valid. This does not have to happen now.” A concern acknowledged honestly lands better.